7.11.2008

The Brewers Are Fucking Dicks

I count the Brewers as my second favorite team, behind of course the Twins. I was happy to see Corey Hart and his sunglasses that he wears at night get voted as the last fan-chosen addition to the All-Star team because he plays ball with a combination of power and speed that is really exciting.

But holy shit, the rest of the Brewers can fuck off.

He's up there at the post-game press conference with his cute little daughter, enjoying the moment, and then WOOSH, here comes the panic. Not only does this pack of mongoloids pour beer on a three year old girl but the douche-train plows the tables right in to her.

God, if Rickie Weeks and Bill Hall were as good at hitting for average as they are scaring children I would be ok with just handing the pennant to Ned Yost and saying "You know what? Let's just take the rest of the summer off and go to Lake Geneva." If I were Corey Hart I would celebrate by punching every one of those guys in the fucking nuts and dousing their wives and children with rubbing alcohol while laughing and lighting a fat cigar with a blowtorch.

So good job, Corey. Tell your teammates to eat a dick real fast.


1 comment:

Pave the Whales said...

Aww, c'mon, Puma. He'll get his revenge, I'm sure.

Plus, she's the daughter of a professional athlete. This won't be her last champagne shower.